The Road of Faithfulness

I've been thinking a lot about faithfulness. 

I'm realizing that all of life is an exercise in faithfulness. 

Especially when we're young. I sometimes think that all we are called to when we're young is faithfulness. 

Because God is shaping us for something. He is refining us for the purpose for which he made us. 

And if we can't be faithful, we probably won't ever get where we're meant to go. 

Some of us have longer roads in faithfulness. And that can be wearying, because we worry and wonder if we're ever going to get where we're meant to go. We feel like we're never gonna be released to walk in our calling, our purpose. We feel like we're in the same circle forever. And, for me, it seems like all God ever speaks to me about is faithfulness. And all he asks me for is more faithfulness. 

And we feel like it will never change. Or maybe we have to go do something else because we don't think God is speaking to us, so we must have "missed" it. So we run to do something else because maybe that will be the open door. Maybe then God will speak to us. Maybe then it will be clear. Maybe then we'll be able to walk in our calling. 

But I think the truth is, all God is looking for is faithfulness. And when we have a long road of faithfulness, it's because God is tempering us to last. 

When we are released to our destiny, we'll be able to hold onto it. We'll be able to last. We won't question it. We won't give up. We won't let discouragement kill us. We'll be able to weather the storms that will beat against us, because we lasted the road of faithfulness. 

We stayed when no one else did. We sacrificed what no one else would. We gave what no one else would. We waited when everyone else gave up. We pressed forward when everyone else walked away. We hoped against all hope. We believed against all evidence. 

All because we lasted the road of faithfulness. 

Truth is, I've spent 15 years actively walking the road of faithfulness. And for the vast majority of it, I had no idea that's what I was doing. 

Most of the time it looked like me doing the same boring things. It looked like me laying awake at night worrying that I've "missed it." It looked like me furiously scribbling in a journal all my thoughts and questions and feeling like I never had any answers. It looked like being overlooked while other people got recognized and promoted. It looked like discouragement, because I thought maybe I was never going to step into my destiny. 

It looked like YEARS of waiting. It was a lot of unexciting, uninteresting years of doing the small task in front of me. That's it. That's the road of faithfulness. It's not pretty. It's not poetic. 

It's difficult. And uncertain. And quite frankly, it's lonely. Because a lot of people won't walk the road of faithfulness. 

And truthfully, I'm still there. I'm still walking the road of faithfulness. I'm still not sure I've stepped into my destiny. And that's ok. Because I see the big picture now. The Lord has been so kind to me. He let me see the road I'm walking on. I can't see the destination. But he showed me the road I'm on. So even when I have no answers it's ok, because I know the road. 

So I won't give up. I refuse to walk away. I refuse to be beaten by length of this road. I refuse to be intimidated by the all the things I can't see and can't understand. 

If NOTHING ELSE, I will be FAITHFUL. 

Right here, right now, with what has been entrusted to me. That's it.

If two roads diverge in the woods, the one less traveled is called faithfulness.