Saturday, October 29, 2016

A New Feminism

I read an article recently about five celebrity men who are "self-proclaimed feminists" and very proud of it, apparently.
The idea of that is nice. A sound sentiment, to be sure.

But in this day and age, I think the idea of feminism is both redundant and ineffective.

Now, let's be clear. I am a woman. A strong, brutally honest, independent and opinionated woman at that. I've been called intimidating and bossy. Aggressive. Harsh. Cold. Unfeeling. A robot. The list goes on. Don't get me wrong, I'm not offended. Well. Unfeeling is a little hurtful. That one actually isn't true. 
But I want to laugh when women are offended about being called bossy. Fine, I'm bossy. When you're the best you can be bossy. Until then, I'll be bossy. ;)





But I digress. The point is, I AM a woman.

I think modern feminism has ruined us in a way. Feminism has created a world where woman think they're better than men. And it’s very subtle, because no one would ever say it outright. But think about it- it's everywhere. TV shows, movies and commercials. More often than not men are portrayed as silly, ignorant, immature, bumbling fools. They're shown as the clueless father, and only the mother can relate to her children. In every argument between husbands and wives, the man is wrong, the woman is right.
It's embarrassing actually. I'm embarrassed by the portrayal of men in the entertainment world. I’m embarrassed to think that we perpetuate an idea that women are better than men and then call it feminism. And if you know me at all, you know how I feel about extremism. Feminism has created an extreme. Woman rules all, and men are our subjects to control and demean as we see fit. I think it’s somehow to make up for the years when women were lesser than. It apparently doesn’t matter that those days are over, we have to make the oppressive men pay! 

Feminism began because a time once existed in which women were truly not equal to men. We couldn’t own property, or vote. We weren’t taken seriously without a husband, or a man to vouch for us.
It does make me angry to think that there was a time when the world viewed woman as less important or valuable than men. It makes me angry to think that places exist in the world where this is still true. It’s disgusting to me.

As a woman, I have to be honest. I don’t NEED feminism. And here’s why: Simply by the fact that I am a living, breathing person, I AM EQUAL. A man has no more inherent value than I do. I don’t need feminism to tell me that I’m valuable, or that I’m equal to a man. I am equal because I’m a person- the same way that any man is a person. I could also point out that even the Apostle Paul informed us that in Jesus, male or female doesn’t matter, because we’re all one in Christ (Galatians 3:26-29). No one is excluded. 

So forgive me, I’m not impressed by your self-proclaimed feminism. Every single person on the face of this earth should be a “feminist.” 

And yes, I’m aware of the gender wage-gap argument. I could point out that studies* have been done to show that when woman are paid less in the professional world it’s usually because they’ve chosen a field or specialty that isn’t as highly paying as other fields. Not because a woman automatically gets paid less. I could also point out that if companies could get away with paying women less based on gender alone, no company would ever hire men. Why pay more when you can pay less on something as arbitrary as gender? It’s just simple dollars and cents.

I'm also aware of the company line that says "feminism is about equality!" That's great. However. The vast majority of "feminism" that is portrayed in the world doesn't support that line. Most of the time, feminism comes across as degrading and ugly. It screams equality while it's actions tear down anyone who stands in it's way. It doesn't make sense. 

I’ve even recently heard the argument that people want to vote for a particular presidential candidate because she’s a woman and it’s “historical.” I would like to point out that voting for a woman simply because she’s a woman is actually the very antithesis of feminism, but that’s probably none of my business. 

I absolutely reject the idea that anything should be handed to me because I’m woman. And you know what, I’ll gladly work harder than the dude next to me, because I want to prove that I deserve a job because I’m the BEST, not because I’m a woman. If I get turned down, that’s ok. I’ll work harder, be better and in the end, they’ll wish they’d hired me. But that’s my own tenacity talking now. In all honesty, most of the time, I think a lot of women are very sore losers. Women don’t want to admit that a man might be better at something than they are, or have better experience or expertise.  

Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m sure there are people out there who possess a prejudice against women. Most of the time, it’s probably unintentional, or sub-conscious. Based on how they were raised perhaps. I have no doubt that it exists. I don’t think it rules the world. 

Don't misunderstand me. I'm FOR women. I like strong women. I identify with strong women. I enjoy working with strong women. I love seeing women succeed. But not at the expense of men. Sorry. That's not a feminism I want to be a part of. 

I think we need a new kind of feminism. A feminism that doesn’t need to degrade men. A feminism that doesn’t need to rule all. A feminism that knows and generously acknowledges that we are ALL equal and important, simply because we are living, breathing human beings. A feminism whose actions match their words. A feminism that is willing to earn the right to be recognized because we’re the best, not because we’re women. A feminism that is strong and proud, because women are awesome. A feminism that respects and honors men, because they’re awesome too. 

Bottom line: I don't want to live in a world where Man is king and I don't want to live in a world where Woman is king. I want to live in a world (and this is probably some very wide-eyed idealism on my part) where the right people are in the right places for the right reasons. And things like gender or race aren't factors, because it simply doesn't matter.
But that's just me. 


*Prager University: https://youtu.be/1oqyrflOQFc


Sunday, October 16, 2016

Life & Choice

I read this book recently. Timely, in light of our current political state. 
I would encourage you to read it for yourself. It’s graphic. It’s honest. It’s vulnerable. A real first-person account of working in the world of Planned Parenthood. In all honesty, it’s startling and eye-opening. But worth the read. 




I’ve been thinking about abortion quite a lot recently. Maybe it’s the current climate. Maybe it’s just getting older, and considering how precious life is. Maybe because I don’t recall the pro-life/pro-choice debate ever being so hotly contested in my lifetime. 

Please, don’t misunderstand. This isn’t about democratic v. republican ideology. This is about life and death. This isn’t about condemnation. Honestly, I think the issue of abortion is far more spiritual than it is political. 

But we’ve really convinced ourselves of the value, the need, the importance of abortion. 
Don’t you think it’s funny that the primary verbiage we use is “Women’s Choice” and not abortion? Interesting, isn’t it. Is it possible we don't want to own up to what that really means? Just a thought. 
We’ve conditioned ourselves to really believe that the first priority is Women’s Choice. Not life. 
Let’s be honest. It’s utterly ridiculous to say that a baby (“fetus”) isn’t a baby from conception on. Consider the logic of that for a moment. How can something that is "not a baby", magically become a baby at some point? I don't believe a form of logic exists wherein that makes sense. 

I’m bothered by the tone and attitude with which we discuss this issue. Maybe I could take it better if we could be honest about what this is. Abortion IS murder. It’s not pretty, but there it is. It’s not a righteous cause. Let’s be honest and discuss why we’re ok with murdering innocent babies in the name of women’s lib. 

The most recent estimates* I can find show that nearly 60 MILLION babies have been aborted since the approval of Roe v. Wade in 1973. That number staggers me. It guts me. I can’t fathom it. 60 MILLION. 
Consider for a moment how many people are missing from the world that should be here. Husbands and wives, sons and daughters. Friends, cousins, co-workers. These are PEOPLE we’re talking about. 
Because- make no mistake, they are people. We can make ourselves feel good by saying it’s about women’s rights. We can expunge ourselves of any responsibility by saying “it’s a fetus, not a baby.” But those are just words, and frankly, they’re untrue. 
It IS a baby. And it’s devastating.  

We could talk about the 7 characteristics that are generally used to determine life in any organism. I could tell you that growth is one of the chief characteristics. Just so we’re clear- a heartbeat is not one of the 7 characteristics. But again, so we’re clear, even a “fetus” is growing. From conception on, growth is happening. 
For example. A tree is living organism. It grows, yet it doesn’t have a heartbeat. But we KNOW that a tree is living thing. Interesting, don’t you think? 

We could talk about how life is so much more than 9 months in a womb, or the decades following. We could talk about how life is eternal. How, as Psalm 139 says, God knit us together in our mother's womb and wrote every day of our lives before we ever took a breath. Life is precious, and eternal.

But I digress. 

Please take a moment, and really consider how serious the issue of abortion is. For me, this is paramount. This is the issue I can’t see past. And believe me, there are lots of other issues. But this is the one that keeps me up at night. And spiritually speaking, I think this is the issue that will speak for us in eternity. 
Forgive me if you feel that I’m attacking your right to choose. That’s not my intention. And the truth is, you matter. I respect you and your voice, even if your belief differs from mine. You and I both got to live to express our opinions and beliefs. 60 million others didn’t. 
Simply put, life is precious. It’s irreplaceable. There are no duplicates in people. Every single life is significant and immeasurably valuable. And I value life more than choice.




Sources:
http://www.abbyjohnson.org (UnPlanned by Abby Johnson)

More resources: